Miya's Letter

Dear Kyosei,

All my life, I’ve been searching for a perfect fantasy-like romance. When I was a child, my mother used to read fairy tales to me. As I grew up, I kept on reading romance books. I’ve always clung to the dream of one day finding a prince that will sweep me off my feet and give me a happy ending. It was naïve and childish, but that dream kept me looking forward to the days to come.

As you probably know, I was quite a studious person. I always kept my nose in a book and focused on my studies, so much that I had no time to spend with anyone. My parents had high expectations from me and I wanted to do my best not to fall short of these expectations. But there was a time when I got careless in a test and I had a low score. It wasn’t that low and I could make up for it by studying further, I told myself. Unfortunately, my father didn’t share my optimism and scolded me for being careless.

I found myself on the school rooftop the next day, looking at the vast world outside the school. I removed the ribbon from my hair to enjoy the wind blowing against my hair. It was a liberating feeling. But it hardly made me feel better. I’ve started thinking of how insignificant my existence was. I saw myself as a small petal only noticed on a flower; a petal no one will miss if it falls. The angry voice of my father echoed in my head. I realized that he only saw me for my achievements and not as me. I’ve began wondering if I would be missed if I was gone. If my father will regret scolding me afterwards, then serves him right. I had just finished preparing myself to jump off the rooftop and get everything over with when I was startled by the opening of the door behind me. I met you, and I couldn’t jump anymore as I'm afraid of how witnessing that would affect you.

Day after day, I returned to the rooftop to try again, but you always came before I could even go beyond the handrails. At first, I didn’t come during busy days since I wanted to keep my grades up so my parents wouldn’t suspect anything. But I got careless once again and my father scolded me once more. Thinking you might not have the time to go to the rooftop if we had lots of homework, I tried again during a busy day. But you were still there. You asked me why I was there that day and I quickly came up with an excuse. We spent the rest of the afternoon talking, and I really enjoyed myself. On that day, I found something new to look forward to.

For some reason, I found it really easy to share my stories and fantasies with you. I felt like I could just share anything. There were a few times when I thought you were just nodding away without really listening to my random ramblings, but I didn’t care.

Then came the necklace that you said made me fall for you. Looking back to everything that has happened, I can’t say I don’t believe you entirely. But it would really be funny if that ugly thing really had that ability. But assuming that it was real, thankful as I am that it made me fall for you, I don’t think you should keep it. After all, if love is only held together by something, then it’s hardly love.

I really didn’t understand the reason why you love me. But I know I loved you because I love the me that is with you. You made me feel special. With you, I felt more than just a petal of a flower. That’s why I am sure my love for you is real.

Our story was far from perfect. It was not like the romantic fantasies I had been clinging to all my life. I was not the perfect princess and you were hardly the prince I had imagined would sweep me off my feet. But it was our story and I loved it.

I am really thankful to you, Yumi, and the rest of the class. All of you showed me that I wasn’t as insignificant as I believed. All of you showed me that there are still people who would miss me if I was gone. All of you gave me a reason to cling to life.

My parents didn’t like my spending so much time in the school after classes. Knowing they won’t believe me if I said I had been studying the whole time, I told them the truth, and father didn’t like it. At first, he scolded me every day and mom always tried to calm him down. I don’t even know how many times I’ve been grounded. I ignored his scolding and kept meeting you anyway. Soon, father got tired of scolding me and decided that I have to go study overseas after I graduate. I didn’t like it, but mother convinced me to agree, saying they would only approve of my spending after classes with you if I agreed.

So now, I have to leave you. I’d like to think of this as a beginning of new stories for us, and not the end of one. I can’t ask you to wait for me, as I don’t even know what will happen and I don’t want to keep you from finding your happiness. I really believe someone would love you more than I did. So please don’t wait for me. Live on!

Farewell,
Miya

Day27

Everyone stood there, all lined up, waiting for their names to be called. The event took place in our gymnasium. The usually loud bustling place emitted a quiet formal atmosphere. The chatters from the students were easily drowned out by the voice of our school principal, the speaker.

After her name was called, she proudly approached the stage. Everyone’s eyes were glued to her as she stepped into the stage, accepted the diploma and medal from the principal, bowed to him, and bowed to the audience. A large round of applause filled the room. It didn’t seem like I was looking at the same person I hanged around on the school roof with. The girl I was watching held herself proudly. She seemed so mature at the moment.

I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to catch up with her on her way home. Our class was taking pictures with each other and Miya left early. It didn't even occur to me that she was already missing until Ria asked me where she was.

I ran as fast as I could. I didn’t want her to leave just like that. Her words from our conversation this morning, before the ceremony, echoed in my head as I ran. She was ready to accept everything. I saw it from the way she looked earlier. I, on the other hand, wasn’t ready to let her go yet. I loved her so much, and I know she also loved me. As always, she was willing to sacrifice her own happiness for my own. She was ready to keep all the pain to herself.

“What do you think of Yumi?” she asked me.

“She’s a great friend,” was my answer.

“Cute?”

“Very,” I smiled. “What’s this about?”

“You do know that she likes you a lot, right?”

“That’s just because of the necklace,” I shrugged. “There’s no way she would otherwise.”

“Really?” she asked. “I happen to believe her situation’s the same as mine though.”

I couldn’t believe I didn’t realize what she was trying to do earlier. She probably thought pairing me up with Yumi would make me happy even after she’s gone.

“MIIIYAAAAA!!!!” I cried as loud as I could, upon reaching her house.

I heard a door open from behind their gate, soon followed by the opening of the door in front of me.

“Izaki-sama?” a lady in a maid outfit asked.

“Is Miya here?” I asked, not taking the time to care about formality at the moment.

“Rinei-sama has already left for the airport with her father. She asked me to give this to you if you ever come by,” she said as she handed out a few folded pieces of stationery.

As quickly as I could, I unfolded the letters and read the contents. After reading the letter, I knew what I had to do. Noticing a bicycle behind the woman in front of me, I asked to borrow it. She looked behind her and asked me what I plan to do with it.

“I have to go after Miya. I have to at least see her off!” I answered.

“You won’t make it in time. The airplane will depart ten minutes from now and it’ll take at least twenty minutes to go there by bike,” she warned.

“I have to try!” I insisted and forced myself into the gates and to the bike. From what she said, I already knew which airport Miya was in. I rode the bicycle and was ready to go with it.

“Wait here!” she called and went around the house.

I waited impatiently, wondering what it might be she was doing. Soon, she arrived holding a bunny beanie around her arms.

“Here,” she said. “The master told me to get rid of it after you left the last time. I secretly gave it to Rinei-sama, but she asked me to keep it instead as she knows I will get in trouble with her father if he finds this in her room.”

I accepted the beanie and stuffed it into my bag. Nodding to her and thanking her, I sped off to the direction of the airport. Despite going as fast as I could, it felt like I was going so slowly. I felt a few drops from the drizzle before I noticed the dark sky above me. I knew it was going to rain, but I wasn’t about to let anything stop me.

It took me fifteen minutes before I could see the airport, it seemed so far away. I was drenched from the rain and it was getting hard to maneuver the bicycle. Whether it was because of the rain or my fatigue, I didn’t know.

Leaving the bicycle near the guards, I ran inside the building. Looking at the flight schedule, I found out the flight was delayed by a little, but was to depart in three minutes. I knew then that I couldn’t see her anymore as she would already be inside the plane.

I went back outside and took the bike. Not feeling like riding the bike, I just walked with it. The rain spattered on my whole body as I blankly walked to a nearby bus stop. Taking a seat on a chair, I watched a plane depart from the airport.

“Goodbye, Miya…”

Day26

In a couple of weeks, everything will be over. There will be no more studying for me, our class would graduate, and Miya will be leaving. This day was probably the last day I get to spend with her as she would be too busy afterwards.

She wasn’t exactly playing around when Yumi called her this morning. It took a while for Yumi to convince her to spend the day with us, though Yumi didn’t really tell her that I will be spending the day with them.

Since I was with her, Yumi was fine with Miya meeting her in the park. I hid in the bushes while Yumi was waiting under a lamp post. When Miya arrived, all dolled up, and was near Yumi, I sneaked behind her and grabbed her shoulder. Yumi and I laughed so hard when Miya jolted in surprise.

“Kyosei, you jerk!” she screamed at me when she saw me, whilst hitting me with her bag.

I shielded myself while laughing, unable to say anything in response.

“I forgot to mention that he was coming along, didn’t I?” Yumi asked, still laughing.

“I don’t think you really forgot,” Miya answered, glaring at the two of us.

She didn’t really stay angry at us for long. She knew we were only kidding, and she found it amusing later on. But it didn’t stop her from complaining.

“And here I was, looking forward to an all girls’ outing,” Miya complained, pouting.

“All girls?” I asked. “There’re only two of you…”

“What’s wrong with that? All could consist of a couple too,” Miya answered.

I knew better than to argue, so I remained quiet. We didn’t really aim to go directly anywhere, so we just wandered around the shopping district. Yumi pulled Miya to several clothing and accessories stores. I went with them in the first few, but stopped going into the stores later on, especially when they started entering lingerie stores. I kept myself occupied by looking around other stores like hobby and magic shops.

We went to a restaurant, well known for its desserts, after I received a call, which was around 1:30pm. Upon arriving, I opened and held the door for Miya to enter. When she did, everyone inside welcomed her by shouting, “Surprise!” Everyone from our class was there.

Hitori handled the reservation of the restaurant and was the one who spread the word about the surprise. Yumi and I were the ones to lead Miya to the place after Hitori gives us the signal, which was the call I received earlier. After I told Hitori that Yumi wanted to hold a surprise party for Miya, Hitori was determined to make it successful. He started off by telling some of the girls who usually ate with Miya, then the word was just passed around. I was surprised Miya wasn’t able to find out about it.

“W-what’s this for?” Miya asked, shocked of what she just saw.

I placed my hand on Miya’s head before whispering to her, “Though you always kept a low profile in class, everyone felt that you’re an important piece of the puzzle which is our class. Without you, our class wouldn’t be the same.” Turning to her, I continued, “When they found out you were going to leave after we graduate and we were planning on having a farewell party for you, everyone was willing to help out.”

“How could I be so important?” Miya asked, tears dripping down her cheeks. Everyone looked at her with concern, all silent. “I didn’t talk much. I kept myself in my own world, always refusing to go to outings and class get-togethers.”

“Hey, that’s who you are! We didn’t have to take that against you!” Ria, one of the girls Miya usually had lunch with before, exclaimed.

“That’s right! We love you for who you are!” some guy’s voice added. I didn’t know whom it came from. “Especially Izaki!” he laughed, followed by some others.

“You think you can just leave without a word? We won’t let you!” Hitori shouted.

Miya smiled, wiping away her tears. Yumi approached her and hugged her from behind. “You’re not alone, Miya-san. You might not notice it, but I believe that you’ve touched everyone here in some way. It might be in some little help you offered; maybe it was something you said. Or maybe it’s through a smile you showed them. I, for one, have had my life change by you. I was blessed to have you as my friend.” Yumi whispered, starting to cry herself.

Everything went by great after that. Aside from the great meal, some of our classmates prepared some presentations for everyone. Yumi sang Yuki no Kisetsu’s theme song, which Miya sang on our date before, and everyone praised her great performance afterwards. Yumi looked so happy, having so many friendly people around her. For the first time, I’ve witnessed how close our class has become after our three years together. Whenever we were in the classroom, we only saw each other as friends and classmates, but the scene I saw today portrayed a big family. The party ended with Miya thanking everyone for everything.

“… And finally, I’d like to thank Yumi who, as I was told, set this party up. I didn’t realize it until now. But I really, really, love everyone!” were her final remarks to everyone.

We were all speechless. Some were already in tears. I clapped my hands and everyone followed my lead. It was a grand memory.

After that, everyone went home. Hitori accompanied Yumi to her home. Yumi didn’t seem to mind. I remember the two of them conversing with each other a lot during the party. I offered to walk Miya home and she accepted.

We didn’t get very far from the restaurant when it started raining. Miya and I ran to the nearest shade we found, which was under an awning in a bus stop by the road. We sat down on a couple of seats there.

“Hey,” Miya whispered. “Thank you for doing all this for me.”

“It was my pleasure,” I whispered. “Besides, the credit belongs to Yumi. I hardly did anything.” I added.

Miya shook her head. “It wouldn’t be the same if you weren’t there,” she smiled.

Both of us didn’t say anything for a while after that. Miya rested her head on my shoulder and I placed my arms around her. I wished that moment would last forever.

“About the necklace,” Miya suddenly whispered. “You weren’t kidding, were you?”

“You believed it?” I asked, not really wanting her to think about that anymore.

“I can’t imagine you making a joke to me about that. Especially at the moment you said it,” she replied. “I was just too preoccupied with my thoughts then to really think about it.”

After she said that, I didn’t feel like keeping it from her anymore. “Hitori was the one who pointed it out to me. He suspected that you fell for him when you did. He told me everything.”

“So, do you think this relationship is a lie?” Miya asked.

“I really love you,” I whispered. “But your feelings might not be…” I paused to think of the word I wanted.

“…real?” Miya finished for me. “Do you even know why I love you?”

I turned to her, remembering what she said back on Valentines’ Day. “Because you love the you that is with me…” I answered.

“That’s right,” she whispered. “I admit that I was suddenly attracted to you at a time. And I caught myself thinking a lot about you. But it was the times I spent with you that I loved. The times when I really loved being in my shoes.” Looking at me, she asked, “Do you think my love is a lie?”

“No,” I answered, shaking my head.

The rain soon stopped and both of us stood up. “You know, if it really was true… that your necklace ignited my feelings for you, I’m still happy.” She walked outside and turned around to look at me. “It allowed me to fall in love with a person I could love for the rest of my life,” she smiled.

Memories of our past conversations returned to me. I couldn’t help but smile. But then my joy didn’t last very long. “But we can’t be together that long, can we?” I asked.

Miya shook her head and turned away. “If we were really meant to be together, then we’d be together in the end.”

I let out a small sigh. I wanted to believe that we’d end up together again in the future. But not knowing how long it would be before that time comes, it didn’t really seem realistic to me.

Day25

Hitori and I had a little discussion about the necklace before classes started. After hearing about Miya’s situation from me, he said it was up to me whether I want to enjoy our remaining days together or tell her the truth about the necklace. Of course, I didn’t really need him to tell me that for me to know.

Everybody was getting very busy, especially the seniors. Aside from the coming exams, those who are planning to attend university have to prepare for the entrance exams. As she was planning on studying in an exclusive college in Europe, Miya was busier than most of us in our class.

Thinking I should enjoy Miya’s remaining days here, I anxiously waited for the dismissal bell to ring. Unfortunately, when it did, Miya informed me that she can’t go to the rooftop anymore as she was simply too busy. I was really saddened by what she said. But knowing I had to support her, I faked a smile and just cheered her on.

We left the room together. I was thinking that I should at least walk Miya home. But upon stepping outside, we found Yumi waiting for us.

“Are you planning on going upstairs today?” Miya asked Yumi.

Yumi nodded and turned to me, “Yup! Why, is there something wrong?” she asked, turning to Miya once again.

“Not really, it’s just that I won’t be able to join you guys anymore,” Miya answered. “Well, you still have Kyosei-kun to accompany you, if you want,” she added, placing her hands on my shoulders from behind me.

Yumi turned to me again, “Well, Izaki-sempai might also be too busy…”

“Don’t worry about me,” I told her. “I can’t study immediately just after class anyway.”

“It’s settled!” Miya exclaimed. “Well, I’ll be going first. See ya!” she said as she left.

“Bye!” Yumi called out as we both waved to her.

Yumi and I proceeded to the rooftop, where I told her that Miya was going to study in Europe. She wasn’t surprised, saying she expected Miya to study abroad.

“What matters is what you’re going to do about it,” Yumi added.

“What’s to do? It was her parents’ decision. I can’t just barge in and tell them that Miya’s not going anywhere. Real life doesn’t work that way,” I replied.

“Not that, silly!” she laughed. Tapping my chest with her fist, she explained, “I meant you should do something special. Like a farewell party!”

“Ooh…” I said, feeling stupid. “You’re right,” I said, after thinking about it a little. “But I wonder if everyone’s going to be too busy to come.”

“Worse comes to worst, we can have it with only the three of us,” she answered.

We spent the rest of the afternoon planning for a farewell celebration for her. Both of us shared a lot of unrealistic ideas. In the end, we decided to just spend a Saturday out.

“Try to invite your friend…” she suggested, “What’s his name?”

“Hitori?” I asked, while feeling sorry for the guy.

“Oh, right!” she said. “He seems quite close to Miya-sempai.”

I assumed she only thought that was true because he joined us to shop for Miya’s gift, but I just kept the truth to myself.

After that, Yumi told me she just remembered that she had something to do. I walked with her outside the school grounds and we parted ways.

Day24

I didn’t know what to do anymore. If the necklace really had some kind of enchantment on it, then Miya should know about it. But if it didn’t, telling her about it would only make things difficult. I tried imagining her reaction if I tell her about it and it didn’t seem like it would end well.

After hours of spacing out, the dismissal bell rang. I decided then that I would tell Miya all about the necklace, thinking that it might be best to get it over with. After all, if I kept it to myself and she finds out about it, it might only become a reason for her to get angry at me.

Taking a deep breath, I opened the door to the rooftop. The scene I found reminded me of the first time I met her there. She stood there, looking at the scenery in front of her, her back facing me. Upon noticing my entrance, she turned to me, against the orange skies, her long brown hair, flowing with the wind. A little smile formed on her lips as she greeted me.

“Hi,” I greeted her as I walked to my usual spot.

“My wish was granted,” she giggled. “I was just wishing you would come.”

“Sorry I couldn’t come yesterday. I had something to talk to Hitori about.” I apologized.

“So did you?” she asked, looking at me with a cute smile.

I nodded in reply. “I hope you and Miharu enjoyed yourselves without me yesterday.”

“Of course we did!” she grinned. “She told me about the fun-filled weekend you had, you dog!” she said, giving me a nudge.

“You jealous?” I asked, happy that Miya seemed back to her old self.

Miya shook her head. “Not at all! I’m quite happy that you’re finally getting closer to her.”

“Yeah, I’m happy about that too. Oh, by the way, did you get your gift?” I asked, looking at her.

The happy expression on her face darkened upon hearing my question. Her face showed depression. “I saw it… It was lovely,” she answered.

“Saw it?” I asked.

Miya nodded. “It’s my dad…” Looking at me, she added, “Anyway, I think it might be best if I tell you this now.” She took a deep breath before proceeding. “I’ll be leaving to study in Europe after we graduate.”

What she just said left me speechless. But I realized I also had something to tell her. I quickly snapped out of it and just blurted it out. “I think our relationship was only caused by the necklace!” I realized it was the stupidest time to say that after I already said it.

“I’m not in the mood for jokes, Kyosei!” she replied, upset.

At that moment, I just wanted to repeatedly slam my face against the wall. I wanted to let her know I wasn’t joking, but that certainly was not the best time and conversation to insist on it. “Sorry,” I whispered, not knowing what else to say.

“Forget it… It’s not important,” she whispered, burying her face in her arms, which were folded on the hand-rail.

I hated how inconsiderate I’ve been. Miya was just telling me that she couldn’t be with me after we graduate, and I just had to say something to make her mood worse. For me, what I said was important. But, I’m sure that, for her, it only seemed like I was making a joke and not worrying about her situation at all.

I wanted to say something to her. I wanted to comfort her. But I had no idea on how to do it. Yumi wasn’t with us, and at that time, I really wished she was. Maybe Miya wouldn’t be in such a depressed mood if Yumi were there to cheer her up.

In the end, we both silently wasted the day away. Before it got dark, Miya motioned to leave and I left with her. Without words, we walked to the school entrance. Without words, we parted.

Day23

“Did you happen to lend the necklace to someone?” Hitori randomly asked me this morning during recess.

“What are you talking about?” was my reply. I had no idea what gave him that idea, but if telling him that I have it will make him want to borrow it, I’d rather not do so.

Hitori looked around and sat on the seat next to me. He moved the chair closer, as if he wanted to say something he didn’t want anyone to hear. “You remember that girl I had a crush on?”

“Miharu?” I asked?

“Ssssh!” he shushed, despite the fact that I was already almost whispering. “Yes, her…” he whispered. “Anyway,” he added as he looked around. “There’re too many people here. Let’s talk somewhere else,” he said, standing up.

Thinking that the conversation has entertainment potential, I followed him. He led me to the hallway leading to the school roof. I almost thought he was planning to talk up there, but he stopped midway.

“This place is good enough.” Turning to me, he began, “Has Miharu ever seen you with the necklace on?”

After thinking for a while, I recalled that she did. “Yes, I accidentally bumped into her with it on. Why?”

“Next question! Did she, in any way, give you the impression that she likes you?” he proceeded to ask, ignoring my question.

“Hmm, there was a time I thought that,” I answered, not wanting to tell him the whole truth. I started suspecting what he was coming at that time. Knowing him, he probably really believed that the necklace had the ability to make people fall for a person. I was ready to laugh when he gave me his next question.

“Remember the time, around December, when Rinei seemed down?” he asked me. “Could it be that she had feelings for someone else?”

I didn’t laugh. I couldn’t laugh. Crazy as it seemed, what he wanted to prove started making sense to me. Looking back, I recalled that I used to feel closer to Miya whenever I had the necklace on, which made me believe that the necklace was my lucky charm. It was also after I lent Hitori the necklace when Miya suddenly developed feelings for him. After getting the necklace back, Miya and I became a couple again. Lastly, I remembered that, based on what she said, Yumi felt attracted to me when we bumped into each other, and I had the necklace on that time.

“Based on your serious expression, I guess that’s a yes. I’m guessing you were also just joking when you told me your necklace had some kind of magical power. Well, what do you think?”

I couldn’t answer him. I don’t think he needed an answer. The whole time, he kept his mind open to the idea that the necklace had magical properties, while I already discarded that possibility. But then a thought came over me. I was just about to tell Hitori about it when the bell rang. I just decided to tell him about it some other time. And so, we both went back to the classroom.

Miya ate with us during lunch time, so I didn’t feel like bringing up the topic. Surprisingly, Hitori didn’t bring it up himself. I half-expected him to, but it seemed like he thought that bringing up the topic would break Miya and me up. I guess the fact that Miya also seemed so depressed the whole time didn’t make him feel like talking about it.

It was after classes when I managed to talk to him about it again. When Miya got out of the room, I saw Yumi meet up with her. It made me feel less guilty about going up late.

Hitori waited for me to approach him before talking. “I thought you might want to talk to me about it.”

“I just wanted to tell you that what you thought was wrong,” I told him. “I once walked home, passing by some girls on the way. None of them even gave me a second look.”

“Yeah, it worked similarly for me when I tested it around in school,” he replied.

“Then what did you even bring up the topic for?” I asked him, wondering if he was messing with me for revenge.

“Because I had no feelings for those who didn’t fall for me.”

“Huh?” I looked at him, failing to see his point.

“When Rinei started eating with us, I got envious!” he blurted out. Looking down, he continued in almost a whisper, “I... I noticed she had a cute side.”

I was shocked by what he just admitted. “So… you wore the necklace in front of her?”

Hitori shook his head. “Remember when we were talking about the necklace, and I wore it while saying it looked ridiculous?” he asked.

I tried to think about it, but couldn’t remember anything.

“Well, I noticed Rinei watching us that time. But I didn’t think it would cause anything,” he added.

“So you knew she fell for you?” I asked. Several thoughts ran around in my head. I kept telling myself that the whole thing was ridiculous, but I couldn’t get myself to believe it after everything I just found out.

“I’ve had the suspicion. But I wasn’t really sure until now…” he answered.

After that, both of us remained silent. I couldn’t think of anything to say, not even certain of what to think anymore. Hitori soon decided to leave first, giving me some time alone to think. In the end, I just went home, not even remembering to visit Miya and Yumi in the rooftop.

Day22

It rained again…

Miya and I met up on the school roof as often as we could, especially after we became a couple. The only times we didn’t were during rainy days. Not only are we not able to hang out in the school roof when it’s raining, the rain also made it more difficult to go home, especially if some areas get flooded.

Miya had been acting distant again the whole day. Though she still ate with Hitori and I during lunch, she was deep in thought the whole time. I tried snapping her out of it by asking her some things, but after answering, she just went back to her own world.

I’m not that naïve. I have a good idea why she had been acting that way. It probably had something to do with last Saturday, when her father told Yumi and I that Miya wasn’t home when, in fact, she was. The way she looked back then told me there was something wrong. I just can’t imagine what.

I didn’t really plan on going up on the school roof this afternoon, as it was raining. But when I saw Miya walking to the direction of the school roof, I got curious. Reaching the door, I opened it and found no one.

Tiny spears of water bombarded the ground. Darkness surrounded the whole place. I wondered where Miya might have gone. It was when I was about to go back when I heard her voice.

“Over here,” a voice called from my left.

I turned to my left and saw her sitting on the ground, hugging her knees. She was leaning against the wall, trying to use it to shelter herself even for just a little. But she was still drenched.

“Do you believe that I’ve only been here for around a minute?” she looked at the sky. “And yet, I’m already so wet.”

I quickly grabbed my raincoat from my bag and wrapped it around her. The moment I stepped outside, I quickly got soaked from the rain. “What the heck are you doing? You shouldn’t have gone up here today.”

“Well, you’re here,” she replied.

I just realized then that her voice wasn’t the same as before. Though her tone was pretty much normal, I could sense that she was distressed. “I saw you go up, so I just followed,” I said as I sat on her side.

“I guess I should be happy,” she smiled at me. She then opened her bag, took out her raincoat, and wrapped it around me.

“If you brought along a raincoat, you should have worn it earlier,” I scolded.

“Do you like the rain?” she asked.

“Huh?” was my only reply, being caught off guard by the random question.

“It’s strange. But whenever I feel depressed, I feel like taking a walk in the rain.” Looking up, she continued, “Maybe I just like the feeling of walking alone in the rain, having nothing but the raindrops as my company.”

“Are you depressed right now?” I asked her.

“When I’m sad, the rain cries for me. When I’m angry, the rain washed away my evil intentions. When I’m happy, the rain hums a beautiful melody for me,” was her reply, ignoring my question.

“You don’t need the rain for those anymore. I’m here for you,” I whispered, placing my arm around her and pulling her close.

She rested her head against my chest. “I know. But there was a time when I was alone... And there will also come a time when I will be alone once more…”

My heart skipped a beat upon hearing those words. I’ve been taking my days with her for granted, feeling that we would be together for a very long time. But she was right. Everything might end when we graduate. There’s no guarantee that we will still be as close when that time comes.

“I’ll always be there for you,” was what I wanted to say. But I could not say those words for some reason. I couldn’t help but remain silent. The rain echoed around us, reverberating against the ground.

“I have to go,” Miya whispered.

I nodded silently. I stood up and helped her up. After changing to something dry, both of us went outside without saying a word. Before separating, I suddenly remembered that it was her birthday two days ago.

“Miya, belated happy birthday!” I called out.

Miya was already walking away when I said that. She turned to my direction for a bit, not enough for me to even see her eyes. “Thank you,” she halfheartedly answered before leaving.

It only made me more worried about her. But not knowing what to do, I walked away.

Day21

“She’s not the girl you spent Valentine’s day with, is she?” mom whispered to me, looking at Yumi, who was sitting across the table from us.

“That was Miya,” I laughed. “This is Miharu,” I added. “She’s usually by herself on Sunday so I thought I’d ask her to spend the day with us.”

“Yumi’s my first name!” Yumi announced, raising her hand.

“How nice,” mom replied. “She’s so cute too! I never knew I raised such a flirt,” she laughed. Yumi blushed. “By the way, I’m Kaori!”

“It’s not like that between us!” I complained. “She’s even younger than I am,” I added.

“Hey! There’s nothing wrong with a guy dating a girl two years younger than he is. I wouldn’t approve it if it was the other way around though,” mom replied.

I continued trying to convince my mom that Yumi and I were just friends. I thought mom was really joking, but I kept it up nonetheless as I noticed that Yumi was amused at what she was seeing.

“Since Kyosei asked such a cute girl over, we must commemorate this day. Let’s eat somewhere good today!” mom enthusiastically announced.

“Yeeey~” Yumi cheered.

“Woo, it already feels like she’s part of the family!” mom exclaimed. “Yumi-chan, would you be my daughter?”

Yumi just giggled in reply. Seeing Yumi play along convinced me to just play along with them.

Despite announcing that we’re eating somewhere good, all of us ended up just eating at home. Mom said she wanted Yumi to try her cooking. After eating, I washed the dishes. Yumi and mom remained at the table, chatting along. When I returned after washing the dishes, mom and Yumi glared at me as if I was interrupting them. I decided to just go to my room as it seemed like they didn’t want me there. I didn’t think the two of them would get along so well so quickly. But I was happy that they did. I lay down on the bed, falling asleep by accident.

I was woken up by the sound of the door closing. I looked at the door and saw Yumi standing there.

“Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you up,” she apologized.

I shook my head, sitting up. “Don’t worry about it. I didn’t really plan on sleeping.”

“Can I join you there?” she asked, looking at my bed.

“Huh?” I wondered. “You mean sit beside me, right?”

Yumi giggled. “Of course, silly!”

“What happened to mom?” I asked as she walked to my bed.

“She said she’s feeling tired and went to bed,” she answered, sitting down on my right.

I looked at the time. It was 3:17pm. “She usually takes a nap at 4pm. Looks like you really took a lot out of her.”

“I guess,” Yumi laughed. “She’s really fun to talk to.” Yumi looked at me, “I really appreciate your inviting me here.”

“It seems mom also enjoys finally having a girl to talk to. Feel free to drop by every Sunday.” I whispered.

“Thanks,” she replied as she reached out for my pillow. She hugged my pillow, burying her face in it, “I will…”

It wasn’t long after that until Yumi fell asleep, remaining on a sitting position. I gently laid her down and just watched her, her lips formed a peaceful, contented smile. Watching her like that made me feel like an older brother. It felt as if I wanted to make her happy all the time, protecting her from anything that might hurt her. That smile she had at the moment would be all the reward I will need.

It was around 5pm when the door silently opened. Since the room was very quiet in the first place, I quickly noticed the opening of the door. Mom peeked in and saw Yumi fast asleep. I stared at her, surprised she was already awake.

Giving me a thumb-up sign, mom whispered, “Nice!” winking at me.

I stifled a laugh and woke Yumi up, telling her that her playmate’s back. When Yumi woke up, mom asked us to join her in buying the groceries. Having nothing else to do, both of us came along with her.

While we were in the supermarket, I felt as if I was walking with Yumi and her mother, instead of mine. The way they continued talking to each other made it seem that way to me. Despite her looking cheerful and happy all the time, I always thought mom was actually feeling lonely inside. After all, I’ve been spending time with her only in Sundays. During other days, she’s usually too tired to talk. Yet, even during Sundays, we don’t really have much to say. With both of them being girls, Yumi and mom probably had a lot to talk about.

The three of us eventually walked back home, each holding a bag of grocery stuff. Mom and Yumi were still chatting until something suddenly caught Yumi’s attention. Her sudden silence made my mom look at Yumi, wondering what was wrong. I turned my attention to where Yumi was looking and saw a woman, on the right across the street, holding a mobile phone against her ear, looking back at Yumi. Yumi wrapped the grocery bag around her right arm and waved to the woman with her left hand.

The woman said something to whoever she was talking to on the phone and kept it on a purse which hanged on her left shoulder. Looking at both sides for any car, the woman crossed the street to approach us.

“Kaori-nee-san, Izaki-sempai, this is my mom.” Yumi introduced as the woman stood beside her.

“I’m pleased to meet you,” Yumi’s mom bowed a bit. Turning to me, she asked, “Are you Yumi-chan’s classmate?”

I was still surprised to meet Yumi’s mom at the time, so it took a while for me to reply. “Aah, no… I’m a senior at her school,” I answered, shaking my head. “My name is Kyosei Izaki. This is my mom,” I added, gesturing to my mother, who gave Yumi’s mother a nod.

“I usually spend time with Izaki-sempai and his classmate after school,” Yumi cheerfully told her mother. “It’s why I get back home late recently.”

Yumi’s mother looked at me with a surprised look. I suddenly realized that she must have thought that Yumi didn’t have many friends, if she had any, especially among guys.

“Miharu’s a nice girl,” I said, not knowing what else to say.

“She is, isn’t she?” Yumi’s mother laughed a bit. “Thank you for taking care of her,” she bowed again.

“Well, it’s getting late and I still have to prepare dinner,” mom nudged me, subtly gesturing to Yumi.

I turned to Yumi, who seemed like she was lost in thought. She was looking at the ground; her face had a deep expression. I couldn’t make out whether she was happy or sad. I walked toward her and took the grocery bag she was carrying.

“Go home with her,” I whispered to Yumi while her mother talked to mom. “You probably have a lot to catch up on.”

She turned to me with uncertainty. Smiling, she breathed out, “I will.” She then ran towards her mother, and pulled her arm. “Let’s go home.”

Her mother smiled at her and nodded. “It looks like we’ll be going first,” she laughed, waving to us.

Mom and I happily watched them as they walked away, talking to each other. We were both very happy that they seemed to finally get along. Hopefully, they will continue to get along forever.

The two of them stopped, not far from us, and Yumi turned around. “Izaki-sempai, looks like I won’t be making much use of your offer after all,” she smiled.

I knew she was talking about my inviting her over to our house on Sundays. “That’s fine,” I smiled back.

Day20

After what happened yesterday, I thought I would spend the entire Saturday just resting and probably think about stuff. Basically, I was planning on just wasting the whole day.

I didn’t think answering the ringing phone would completely change my plan. I half expected it to be Miya who was calling, but the voice I heard was much softer than hers.

I was asked to come to the school. I would have preferred the park, but she said it made her feel uneasy going there. Upon getting close to the school entrance, I was pulled into the side by someone. I was surprised by the sudden pull, thinking I was attacked or something. But it was just Hitori.

“What the heck are you doing?” I snapped.

“She’s there!” he cried, pointing to the school entrance. “I left my chemistry book under my table and thought I’d come to take it today. But now I can’t go in!”

I turned my attention to the school entrance, looking for who he might have been talking about. But there was only one person there, Yumi. “Miharu?” I asked.

Hitori grabbed me by my shirt collar. “Wha- You know her name? How?” he asked, shaking me violently.

He talked a lot about his crush. I never thought it was Yumi who he was referring to the whole time. “I know a dark secret she has. I told her to come meet me today or I’d tell everyone.”

This made him more violent. “What the heck are you planning on doing to her?”

I thought that if I kept it up, I’d get beaten to death. So I first made sure that wouldn’t happen. I hit his arms away, making him let go of my clothes. I moved a couple steps away from him before I continued. “You wouldn’t want to know,” I smirked.

Hitori knew me too well to believe it. After I said that, he just sighed, his face told me he didn’t believe me anymore.

I really wanted to play around with his imagination. I knew I had to do something. “Let me show you then,” I whispered then walked to Yumi.

Yumi was wearing a black shirt, which enhanced the paleness of her skin, and a red plaid skirt. A brown checkered shawl was wrapped around her shoulders. I was very close before she noticed me. She tried to wave, but I quickly grabbed her hand and gently forced it down. “There’s someone watching…” I whispered to her. “Just follow my lead,” I added as I placed my right arm around her shoulder. Pulling her close, we walked away from school. Yumi was too confused to do anything else.

We were around the shopping district when I asked her to go inside a girl’s clothing store. I went to a spot Hitori, who was following us the whole time, was trying to hide in. “Now do you believe me?”

“You sick bastard,” he furiously cried. “I never knew you’re such a scumbag!”

I couldn’t take it anymore at this point and just laughed. I thought I should tell him the truth before he really got violent. “I was kidding! Miharu’s a good friend of mine.”

Hitori quickly calmed down, as expected. “So how DID you know her?” he asked again.

“I bumped into her one day and we got to talk,” I answered. “She’s also a good friend of Miya’s and she asked me to go with her to buy Miya’s gift.”

“Let me come along! Introduce me!” he begged. “Please! I’ll be your best friend.”

Of course, knowing now that she’s the one he had a crush on, I agreed. I thought it would benefit both of them since Yumi’s short on friends. Hitori followed me into the store where I asked Yumi to enter. Both of us searched for her. The store was a small one. Since we couldn’t see her, I thought she might have been trying on some dresses. I was right, of course. She walked out from a dressing room, holding about three clothes on her right arm. She returned them to the store clerk, telling him something. Afterwards, she ran towards me.

“I couldn’t find anything that suits Miya-sempai. But I got bored, so tried some on,” she smiled. She then turned to Hitori, who was behind me. “He’s the one who was following us, isn’t he?” she asked worriedly.

I couldn’t help but laugh at her question. “Well, yeah.” Patting Hitori on the shoulder, and moving him to in front of me, I introduced him. “This is Hitori. He’s my best friend… Of course, he’s nothing compared to Miya.”

Being in front of his crush, my words had no effect on Hitori. “H-hello!” he stuttered.

Yumi looked puzzled for a while then laughed. “I see. Nice to meet you, Hitori-sempai.” She paused after that. “Wait… What’s his last name?”

“Takashiro,” Hitori answered. “But I’m not fond of it, so you can call me Hitori.”

“I find it kinda cool, though. But if that’s what you want, Hitori-sempai it is,” she smiled.

Hitori was overjoyed upon hearing her words. I knew I had to stop him before he completely shows his idiotic side and told them that we should start searching for Miya’s gift.

“So it’s Rinei’s birthday… When, exactly?” Hitori asked us, while we’re strolling down the shopping district.

“Today,” I answered. “It was Miharu who told me though.”

“Izaki-sempai’s pretty mean to forget his girlfriend’s birthday,” Yumi pouted.

“I can’t help it. The topic never came up,” I complained.

“When’s YOUR birthday?” Hitori asked Yumi. “I promise I’ll always remember it.”

“May 16,” Yumi smiled. “But don’t worry yourself over me. You’re graduating before then.”

“Oh, but it’s my pleasure to celebrate such a beautiful girl’s birthday,” Hitori replied.

We were walking in such a way that Yumi was between the two of us. Upon hearing Hitori, Yumi nervously inched closer to me. Hitori kept quiet after that. At least he knew better.

It took a while before we could find a gift for Miya. We got her a white bunny beanie. We had a late lunch in a hamburger restaurant after that, around 1:30pm. Hitori paid for himself and Yumi, saying something about a senior taking care of the younger students. He got to talk a lot with Yumi. I don’t really remember what it was that they talked about since I wasn’t paying much attention in the first place. Hitori left after lunch, saying he still has to go get his book.

I asked Yumi if she knew where Miya lived, as I didn’t. Fortunately, she did.

“I asked her a few days ago since I planned to surprise her for her birthday,” she chirped.

“Well, that’s lucky,” I replied.

Yumi led me to Miya’s house afterwards. Miya’s house was a mansion compared to my house. It was at least six times bigger than mine, and this was the house alone. If I were to include her yard, and the area behind the gate surrounding her house, I’d think it was around twelve times my house. At the sight of it, I felt so embarrassed that I even showed her my home.

“Miya’s richer than I expected,” I whispered to Yumi as I stared at the place. The gift on my hand felt so worthless.

Yumi turned to me, with a questioning look. “How poor did you think Miya-sempai was?” she asked.

“Uh… You’re not surprised by the size of her house?”

“Well, it’s a little bigger than mine. But it’s pretty much what I expected.” She answered as she rang the doorbell.

I felt like a peasant after hearing her. I wondered how Miya saw me when she saw my house. She must’ve seen me as a penniless vagrant. To think that, all these time, I’ve been spending time with people way beyond my class.

“Who is it?” a female voice coming from the speaker above the doorbell asked. I quickly hid the beanie behind me.

“We’re friends of Miya-sempai!” Yumi chirped. “Is she here?”

“Miya-sama?” the voice asked.

“Hai…” I answered. Hearing her mention the word ‘–sama’ made me assume she was a maid of theirs, impressing me all the more.

“Please wait for a moment,” the voice requested.

Yumi and I both waited silently for a few minutes. Finally, the door was opened by a man wearing a red polo shirt and black slacks. He had grayish hair and mustache, which made me think that he’s Miya’s father.

“Izaki and Miharu, I presume?” he asked. The tone of his voice made me nervous.

“Hai!” Yumi chirped. “We’re here to give something to Miya-sempai.”

“Miya’s not here at the moment, and she won’t be coming back anytime soon. Perhaps some other time.” He replied.

“Then…” Yumi looked at the beanie I was holding behind me. I pulled it out and held it out to him. “Can you please give this to her when she comes back?” Yumi asked.

“Okay,” he answered as he took the beanie. “Is that all?” he asked.

Yumi and I looked at each other. Turning back to him, Yumi answered, “Yes. Thank you very much!” We both bowed down and he closed the door.

Looking up, I could see the second floor window above the wall surrounding their house. Behind the window, I saw a concerned Miya, her fist raised to her chest, looking at me. We walked away from the house, to the direction of the school.

“I wonder where Miya is,” Yumi asked, worriedly, as we walked. “It’s her birthday. Yet, she’s not with her family or with you.”

To refrain from worrying her more, I decided not to tell her what I just saw. “I’m sure she’s fine. After all, her father was at the house. Maybe she’s with her cousins or something,” I answered, reassuring her.

“Yeah, you’re right,” she sighed in relief. Turning to me, she added, “Well, it’s too bad we couldn’t get to see her. Do you want to go tomorrow?”

Considering what I just witnessed, I declined. “I wasn’t able to spend last Sunday with my mother. I want to be with her tomorrow.”

“Aah, family day, is it?” she smiled. “That’s nice,” she whispered looking back in front of her.

“Don’t you have that with your mother?” I asked, turning to her.

She shook her head. “I think my mother is afraid of being with me,” she whispered. “She must’ve felt guilty at her trying to distance me from others and wanted to leave me alone. I tried approaching her several times, but each time I did, I only made her feel more awkward.” She turned to me with a small smile. “It’s like I’m the parent, isn’t it?”

I placed my hand on her head, rubbing it. “It seems that way. You’re really more mature than you look.”

“Have you fallen in love with me a little?” she playfully asked.

“You’re only mentally mature. Miya is mature in both mind and body!” I laughed.

Yumi pouted. “Not nice!” she whined, looking down.

“So what do you do on weekends?” I asked.

“I finish homework on Saturday and go out on Sundays,” she answered, looking back in front of her.

“All by yourself?” I asked.

She nodded in reply.

“So you’re going to do your homework tomorrow instead?”

Yumi shook her head. “I had a hard time sleeping last night, so I did them then. We didn’t get much homework for next week.”

I realized what happened yesterday must still be on her mind. I tried imagining how it must’ve been like living in her shoes. She was always alone. Her mother kept her from being with other people and also left her side. She must’ve felt so lonely strolling down the streets all by herself every Sunday, surrounded by other families and groups of friends. Suddenly, I didn’t feel poor at all. Even though our house wasn’t big, mom worked very hard for us to be able to live there. I was lucky to have such a loving parent.

“Do you want to spend the day with me and my mother tomorrow?” I asked Yumi.

Yumi turned to me, surprised by my offer. “Okay,” she smiled and nodded.

Day19

The three of us met on the school roof almost every day. There were some days when Yumi wouldn’t join us, probably because of homework. The times we’ve spent together were kind of awkward for me and Yumi. With Miya talking to Yumi as if they’ve been friends for a long time, Yumi was able to get used to being with her easily. Sadly, I wasn’t able to do what Miya had been doing, so a gap between Yumi and me remained. I guess Miya knew that. She often acted as the bridge between us, asking some questions that would allow us to talk to each other for a bit. But the conversations never lasted long.

It had been like that until this afternoon. Miya was absent for the day, so I thought I would just go home after classes. During lunch time, I realized that I should let Yumi know we weren’t meeting on the school roof after classes. I tried looking around for her outside the first years’ classroom after I finished my lunch. Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to find her. Not feeling like asking around, I thought of just telling her after classes.

The dismissal bell rang and I proceeded to the school roof. For a moment, I thought I saw Miya in her usual spot, waiting for me. I quickly realized that it was Yumi who was standing there. Yumi turned to me shortly after I arrived.

“Miya’s absent today, so she won’t be here,” I told her.

Yumi gave me a nod in reply. I was about to turn around and leave when I heard her ask, “So, you’re going?” her eyes were fixed at me.

That question stopped me. It suddenly dawned on me that despite all the time we spent together, I never really saw Yumi as my friend. Being alone in her class all that time, my merely being with her was probably enough for her to see me as a friend. All these time, only Miya was able to really give her the friendship we both wanted for her.

I closed the door behind me, acting as if I wasn't planning to leave in the first place. “No, but I guess it’ll just be the two of us today,” I answered. I walked to her left, my usual spot.

Yumi nodded, smiled, and turned back to the scenery. “Must be pretty boring for you,” she giggled.

“Let’s see who will bore the other,” I laughed. I leaned on the railing upon reaching it. Looking at the scenery, feeling the wind blow against me, I’ve felt as if I was with Miya.

“I’m afraid that’s a competition you cannot win. You can’t possibly bore me,” she turned to me with a smile.

“Hmph, we’ll see…” I replied, still looking at the scenery. I was happy if I could entertain her even just a little. Sadly, I couldn’t come up with anything else to talk about.

“School ends in a month…” I heard her whisper. Smiling to me, she asked, “We don’t have much time left, do we.”
That thought depressed me. After Miya and I graduate, Yumi’s going to be alone again. Hopefully, she would be able to find some friends. But I was afraid that might not happen.

“Izaki-sempai, would you listen to my story?” she asked.

I turned to her, only to see a depressed Yumi. All I could do for her was to listen to her. “Of course,” I answered.

What I’ve heard after that was similar to the story Miya shared, but a little more complete.

Just like me, Yumi never had a father. Her father left her mother shortly after their marriage, when her mother was pregnant, in order to go after some other girl. Yumi’s mother resented that.

Yumi’s mother wanted to prevent her daughter from suffering the same fate. Her chosen action was to keep Yumi from talking to boys as much as possible. From primary school to early middle school, her mother scolded her whenever she was seen being friendly to a boy. Her mother soon realized that it was a mistake to do so, but it had already been too late. Every time a boy approached Yumi, Yumi felt afraid to talk to the boy, much more to become friends with him.

“I spent most of my first year in high school like that. I’ve had a few female friends in middle school, but none of them went to this school. I was convinced I was going to be alone. But there was a time when I bumped into a guy,” she laughed softly. “He was hurrying to go to the school roof after classes, for some reason. He didn’t try to become friends with me, he didn’t even try to know me. But…” she paused. “For some reason, I didn’t want to just pass by him. I didn’t want everything to end with just a touch,” her voice started to crack.

My mind told me that this wasn’t going to end well. But I felt that I should really just let her finish her story. I just listened without even turning to look at her.

“Before he could leave, I was able to summon up the strength to ask him for his name. I guess you already know his answer… After all, it was you.” She stopped to take a few breaths before continuing. “After that time, I would hide in a room, waiting for him to pass by. Then after he did, I would decide if I would follow him to the school roof. But when I was early, I always saw a girl pass by before him. I realized she must have been very special for him to come meet her every day,” she started sobbing. “B-but I couldn’t accept that. I found out I really like this guy.”

My mind was screaming at me. The girl beside me was giving me a confession of her feelings. I wondered if I should tell her I can’t accept her feelings as I already have Miya. But I was afraid of what saying that might do to her. I remained silent, hoping maybe she would say that she realized she didn’t like me after all, or something like that.

Pausing for a bit again, her voice calmed down. “There was a time when classes finished early. I found myself standing below the stairs, leading to the roof, just staring at the door. I thought that maybe I should just go up there and when the other girl arrived, I would somehow make her leave. That way, I could be alone with him.” She gave a soft, small laugh. “I was engrossed in my own selfish thoughts. Someone tapped me on the shoulder and brought me back to reality. She was very nice to me, unaware of the thoughts that were in my head earlier.” She stopped there for a while.

I wondered if it was time for me to say something. But she was the one who did. “Ne,” she called. “Do you love Miya-sempai?”

I turned to her to answer. She was leaning on the hand rail. Her eyes were blocked by the bangs of her hair, but I noticed a stream of dried tears on her cheek. There was an awkward smile on her lips, as if she was really forcing herself to smile. I had to answer. “I do…” I whispered.

“That’s good.” She turned to me with a smile, her cheeks were red and dry tears remained on them. “She’s a really nice girl…” She turned to face the scenery once more. “I wish I could become strong like her someday."

If Miya had been there with us, she would have hugged her after hearing her story. As Miya wasn’t there, I felt it was my duty to do it. I walked to her and wrapped my arms around her small body. I don’t think it would matter if she didn’t want a hug from me, nor if she even needed one. While holding her, I realized it was me who really needed a hug.

I felt her shaking arms wrap around me. “I know I don’t deserve it. I never deserved kindness from you nor from Miya-sempai. But if it’s okay… if it’s not so much to ask…” her voice shook.

“Don’t be stupid…” I whispered. “Miya and I would do anything for you.”

Her arms, wrapped around me, tightened. After a while, I heard her voice again. “Please let me continue being with you two.”

I moved my arms to my shoulder and she inched away from me. “Silly, you don’t even need to ask.” I wiped the dry tears from her cheek.

“Thank you…” she whispered.

Day18

There was a time, after getting my necklace back from Hitori, when I thought of showing it off to Miya. I cleaned the blackboard and arranged the chairs, waiting for everyone to leave. It was a few minutes after everyone was gone when I left the room. The reason I took too long was because I ended up deciding to really arrange the chairs properly. Not wanting Miya to wait too long, I started running. I took the necklace from my bag and hanged it around my neck as I ran. Quickly turning around a corner, I bumped into a girl. She fell backwards and I fell to my side. Looking at her to apologize, I felt my heart skip a beat. She was really attractive, yet she was someone I didn’t recognize. She had a short black hair; the left side of her hair was pulled back by a small hairpin with a flower-shaped design. As I pretty much recognize the face of most, if not all, the faces of the students last year, I thought she might be a freshman.

“I’m sorry!” she apologized as she struggled up. “I should have watched where was going more carefully.”

“No, it was my fault,” I said as I stood up. “I shouldn’t be running in the halls like I did,” I said, as I offered her my hand.

She looked at my hand and looked up to me. She just looked straight at my eyes for a while, as if she recognized me. Suddenly realizing what she was doing, she took my hand and pulled herself up, looking down all the while.

I picked up her bag and a couple of books she dropped. I suddenly thought of Miya and told the girl I was in a hurry and I had to go. I was about to run again but was stopped by something she said.

“Um, my name is Yumi Miharu!” she called out.

I turned to her. I noticed in an instant that she was nervous. I believe she wasn’t comfortable talking to someone older. But I admired her guts in trying. “I’m Kyosei Izaki, a third year,” I said.

She smiled a little and nodded. “I’m a first year. It was nice bumping into you,” she laughed softly.

I laughed, waved, and ran upstairs. I was sure that was the only time I would ever talk to her and quickly forgot her name. On that day, I didn’t see Miya on the rooftop. I assumed she either left after waiting for a bit or she didn’t go up there.

I was surprised to see her there on this day, in our special place, just chatting away with Miya. Miya must’ve heard the door open and turned to me, waving enthusiastically. Yumi also gave a small wave.

I didn’t recognize her immediately. I knew I saw her before, but I couldn’t recall when. I thought maybe Miya would introduce me to her since she probably didn’t know that I’ve met her before. I waved and approached them.

“It’s been a while, Izaki-sempai!” Yumi called out when I got near. Those words quickly blew my plan away.

Miya switched glances between the two of us. “Um, you know her?” she asked me, puzzled.

“Yeah, I’ve met her before. Well, actually, we more of bumped into each other,” I quickly recalled.

“Oh? I never knew that…” Miya replied, looking down, her tone filled with suspicion.

“I never did get to tell you, did I?” I was hoping I wouldn’t have to let them know I didn’t know her name.

“Ne!” Yumi called. “Do you remember my name?” she chirped. I wanted to just slam my head against the railing when she asked that.

Miya looked at me, awaiting my reply.

My mind rushed, I scanned my thoughts for any name that would seem right. “Um…”

Yumi sighed, “I guess not,” she muttered in disappointment, looking away. “Anyway, my name is Yumi. Miharu, Yumi.” She looked at me. “Please try to remember it this time,” she smiled.

I scratched the back of my head. “Ah, I’ll try to. I’m not very good with names.”

Yumi shook her head in reply. “Anyway, it was nice to meet you, Rinei-sempai. And it was nice seeing you again, Izaki-sempai,” she bowed to both of us. “I have to go home now as I have some homework to do. I hope to see you two again soon,” she said politely.

Miya and I glanced at each other for a moment and turned to her. “Ah, yes,” Miya said. “Please join us here if you feel like it.”

Yumi bowed again and left in a hurry. Though I felt that it would be nice to talk to her again in the future, I thought it would be awkward if she joined us in the school roof. I wasn’t comfortable being with a girl in the first place. Being with Miya almost every day made me used to her. But the thought that there would be another girl with us scared me.

“Well, she was a nice girl,” Miya laughed awkwardly.

I turned to Miya, hoping she wouldn’t misunderstand anything. “I should have told you about her. I guess it kinda slipped my mind,” I whispered.

Miya shook her head and looked me in the eyes. “Don’t worry,” she comforted me. “Though I was suspicious at first, the fact that you forgot her name means there’s nothing between you two,” she smiled. “Sorry I invited her without asking you first. It might be awkward for you,” she apologized, as if reading my mind.

“Why was she here in the first place? Did she just happen to go up?” I wondered.

Miya turned to look at the scenery. “Well, on my way here, I saw her looking from below the stairs, as if she wanted to go up. As a sempai, I thought it was my duty to help her, so I asked her what was wrong.” Turning to me, she added, “She told me she wanted to see what was on the roof, but was afraid she might not be allowed to, so I asked her to come with me.”

I turned to the scenery. “Oh,” I replied.

I was afraid that she might have wanted to see me. I remembered that when I left her, I went to the direction of the school roof, and thought maybe she expected to see me up here. Though afraid, I know that I was actually hoping that she really wanted to see me. She was truly attractive, so if she was really looking for me, that would be flattering.

I was ashamed of what I’ve been feeling and felt like I was betraying Miya by thinking of those things. The best thing I could do was not let Miya know I felt like that.

While watching the sun go down, Miya told me the reason she invited Yumi to join us. According to her, Yumi had been alone in her class. The only ones to talk to her once in a while were all guys. But she always had a hard time talking to them, so they too felt it hard to approach her. Yumi tried talking to the girls and making friends with them, and there were some who talked to her.

At one time, Yumi thought she made some friends. But she soon found out that even those who she thought were her friends didn't like her for some reason.

“She seems like a nice girl. And I want to be her friend,” Miya whispered, looking down all the while. “Also, she seemed to be able to talk to you well.” Miya turned to me, “I thought maybe we could help her feel more confident. Maybe give her some happy memories while we’re still in this school.”

I nodded. I felt the feelings I’ve had earlier fade away. What remained were the feelings and good intentions Miya shared with me. I, too, felt like I wanted to be her friend.

Day17

The weekend came to an end and Monday arrived. Miya acted the same way as she did when we were a couple. No, maybe she acted even closer than then. I felt happier than ever, the negativity I used to feel like waiting for the axe to fall never returned. It was as if, somehow, I really believed that Miya and I would never be apart. I knew graduation might change things between us, and probably separate us. But I have a feeling things would work out in the end.

Our classmates noticed the change again, and rumors kept on spreading. Puzzled eyes followed me around. It was unsettling for a while, but I quickly got used to it. I thought it would be harder on Miya, who kept a low profile before we first became a couple. But it turned out that she seemed to be able to handle it better than I did. The way she acted was as if she didn’t notice people talking about her, though it was obvious that she did as our classmates weren’t exactly experts in keeping things secret.

Miya and I talked about the rumors after classes, in our usual place. I asked her if the rumors bothered her even a bit. She just laughed it off.

“Let them talk. I enjoy the attention,” she proudly stated.

“Really? How come you were just ignoring them then?” I wondered.

“No, I wasn’t,” she blushed. “I was just… um…” she scratched her head, dodging my eyes.

“Just what?” I asked, now certain that she was lying.

“Okay… So I don’t like it!” she conceded. “But I’m sure it’ll die down sooner or later.” She then looked at me, her eyes flared with determination. “Our reacting against the rumors is our defeat! We must not give them that satisfaction.”

I sighed and shook my head, finding nothing to say to that. Miya always seemed to get excited over the strangest things, but this trait of hers only made me want to be with her more.

We just enjoyed the scenery for a while after that. It seemed as if Miya didn’t enjoy the silence and she asked me some things about my family, like they were like and what they do.

I told Miya everything there was to know about my mother. I saw no point in not telling her I didn’t have a father so I mentioned that as well. I’ve had so much to say that I kept on talking until it got dark. Miya just silently listened to me. I probably bored her, but she didn’t even show any hint of that. I just stopped later on and told her that it was time to go. She smiled warmly, nodded, and so we left.

Day16

I usually spend Sundays with my mother. With her being too busy six days a week, it had been difficult for us to find the time to spend together. I’ve always reminded her to take breaks every now and then as she always seemed to push herself. But every time I did, she would just smile at me, nod, and sometimes tell me to just keep doing my best so she could rest in the future.

Mom was born in a middle class family. Her parents passed away when she was still in high school. She used some of the money they left her to finish high school and saved the rest for her other needs. She had a hard time getting used to working. But she tried her best at everything. There was a time when her savings was almost depleted but her hard work brought it back up.

She met my dad while transferring companies. He helped her adjust to her new company and she felt very happy there. They both loved one another and dad decided to propose to her almost two years after meeting one another. Unfortunately, dad’s parents hated mom as they wanted dad to marry someone wealthy, being a rich family themselves. Dad persisted and still married mom, even when it was against his parents’ wishes. Because of the unhealthy relationship between mom and dad’s parents, they decided to cut her off when dad passed away, saying she brought misfortune upon their family.

It was a hard time for mother. Losing dad made her feel like she had lost everything. She continued to live lifelessly, just waiting for her time to come, until that one day, when she collapsed in her office.

I’m not so sure. But according to mom, finding out that she was pregnant to me was what brought her hope. She wanted to do everything to raise me and give me a great life. According to her, my birth brought back her determination to live.

Today was different from the usual Sundays. It was Valentine’s Day. She had been talking to me about some guy in her office who kept asking her out for this day, despite her repeatedly turning him down. But before leaving for school last Friday, I told her to accept the guy’s proposal. After all, based on what I’ve heard about the guy, he seemed like a nice guy and she seemed to like him. I closed the door after telling her that.

Because of what I did, not that I’m complaining, mom did go out with him for the day. I was ready to waste the day away by sleeping or watching TV when Miya texted me, asking me to go to church with her and meeting her parents while I’m at it. I felt like refusing. But I felt that she was going out of her way to invite me. Turning her down would be betraying her, so I accepted. She sent me another message, telling me to go to the park.

The last text message she sent me reminded me of the day she broke up with me. But the park was just near the church so I understood why she picked that place. I wasn’t sure as what would be the appropriate thing to wear when going to the church so I ended up just wearing casual.

I didn’t see Miya when I arrived at the park. There were a lot of people walking around, carrying flowers. I assume they’re waiting for their dates. I’ve thought of buying some flowers myself, but decided it would be a bad idea. After walking around for a few minutes, I sat down a park bench and just watched the people passing by. A few moments later, a bouquet of flowers blocked my path, startling me. I turned to the person holding the flowers to complain, only to find out it was Miya. She was wearing a cute pink dress.Her bangs were lifted to the side by a couple of yellow oval hair clips.

I was confused, of course. I, myself, decided against getting flowers for her since she was going to be with her parents and we were going to the church. I half-heartedly accepted the flowers, speechless.

“I’m disappointed,” Miya pouted and sat beside me. “I would really think my boyfriend would bring along flowers or chocolates on our date.”

“D-date?” I exclaimed, turning to her. “You told me we were going to the church with your parents.”

Miya examined my clothes disapprovingly. “So you thought you were going to meet my parents and you wore t-shirt and jeans?”

I felt myself flush at those words. She was right. I didn’t think of wearing something better for her parents. Suddenly, something she said sunk in. “Wait… What did you mean ‘I thought I was going to meet your parents’?”

“It was a joke,” she sighed. “Well, it surprised me and made me happy that you accepted. Sadly, it’s not going to happen today.” Rolling her right hand into a fist raising it, she continued, “Those two decided to take a parents-only date for today and left me all by myself. What? They thought little Miya’s going to just sit there like a good little girl?” I watched her expression change to a vengeful one. “I’ll show them the error of their ways… Mwahaha…” she laughed, what seemed to be a poor attempt of an evil laugh.

Though it was enjoyable to see another side to Miya, I felt weird holding a bouquet. I was certainly not going to go around the city, showing off that I had been given flowers to. “Then, I’ll just go home to-”

“Stop!” Miya cut me short, tugging my shirt. “Is my beloved also going to leave me to face this cruel day all by my lonesome?” she cried dramatically. How she could say all those embarrassing lines so naturally is beyond me.

“No, actually, I was just-” I tried to explain, though was cut short once more.

“Good! Let’s go!” she exclaimed as she stood up and pulled my arm. “I’m not going to let you go until you give me flowers or chocolates or both,” she said in a very persuading tone. Turning to me, she added, “By the way, if you’re going to give me only flowers, it has to pass my high standards and you have to pick them up yourself. If, on the other hand, you decide to give me chocolates alone, you have to make them yourself.”

“Eeh?” I complained, while feeling silly being pulled around by a girl and holding a bouquet in my other hand. “So I pretty much have no choice but to give you both?”

Stopping, she turned to me again. “Can you bake chocolates?” she asked.

I shook my head. “No…”

“Then, yes, you have to get me both.” She turned and pulled me again.

I wasn’t sure where she planned to drag me to. But she stopped when we reached a crepe store. She looked longingly at the crepe displays that I knew I had to get her some. “Which one do you want?” I asked.

Examining each one carefully and answered, “I can’t choose! How can anybody choose from all of these?” she exclaimed like a kid.

“I’ll take the cheapest one with chocolate that you have!” I called out to the shopkeeper.

“Nooo!” Miya complained. “I’ll take that one!” she pointed to a crepe with banana and strawberry toppings, covered with chocolate syrup and topped off with whipped cream.

“Fine… Switch the order to two of those, please!” I called to the shopkeeper while pointing to the same one.

“With vanilla ice cream, please!” Miya added.

“Coming up!” he replied.

After paying and taking the crepes with us, we walked away, nibbling on our snacks. “Well, you got your chocolate. Let’s go look for your flowers,” I told her.

Miya pouted and muttered, “I’ve been cheated…”

As it was very difficult to eat and hold the bouquet at the same time, I told Miya we have to take a seat somewhere. She agreed and we returned to the park. But when we arrived, the park benches were already full. Miya already finished her crepe and was staring at mine.

“Let’s drop by my house for a while to-” Before I could finish my sentence, Miya suddenly moved towards me and swallowed my ice cream, almost whole. “Waaah!” I cried.

After swallowing, Miya placed her hands together and said with a serious face, “The ice cream was melting. I didn’t want to dishonor its sacrifice.”

“I could’ve eaten it myself!” I complained.

“You were saying something about going to your house?” she asked, reverting back to her usual expression.

Giving up, I told her I have to leave the flowers in my house to free my hands. She agreed and we went on our way. Upon arriving, I removed the flowers from their wrapper and placed it in a jar. Of course, I poured some water on the jar to let the flowers live longer. I turned to Miya, just to find her peeking from outside the doorway.

“What’s the matter? Come on in!” I called.

She entered the house, saying something about it being impolite to enter a house without permission. That was the same weird person I was with earlier, right? I took a scoop of vanilla ice cream from our freezer and placed it on my crepe, before finishing it.

“I want ice cream too,” Miya whispered to my ear as I was throwing the crepe’s paper wrapper away.

“No, you already finished two scoops,” I said. “Too much ice cream will be bad for your health.”

“But one of them had almost melted,” she complained.

I placed my hand on her head. “Greedy people reap unripe fruits.”

Miya walked to the corner near the door and sat there.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

“Sulking…” she answered.

Her childishness really amused me. Since I’ve freed my hands, I thought it was time to continue our date. “So, where do you want to go to next?” I asked.

She stood up, and pondered. “How about we do everything we did on our last date?” she suggested. “But this time, we’ll end it right.”

Honestly, that was one suggestion I really didn’t want to follow. But not having a better idea, and knowing I had fun that day before she broke up with me, I accepted anyway.

We skipped the park and just had lunch first at a seafood restaurant near the park. We just paid for what we individually ate. After that, we moved to the arcade, where we also played a few shooting games, then to the karaoke booth, where Miya sang the theme song of “Yuki no Kisetsu”, the movie we watched before, among others.

Instead of watching a movie, Miya wanted to go window shopping, so we did. I bought some flowers while Miya was browsing inside a store and gave them to her when she went outside the store in a panic, just noticing that I was gone. She was ready to bash me with the flowers, but just hit me lightly. She looked really worried that time.

As we did before, we sneaked into the school, arriving at the rooftop at around 6:45pm. We looked at the beautiful scenery, lit up by the light of buildings, houses, and streetlights. It wasn’t as beautiful as the scenery before. But being with Miya made it breathtaking, nonetheless.

Miya sighed deeply then spoke up. “Did you enjoy the day, Kyosei-kun?” she asked in almost a whisper.

I was reminded of that dreadful day with those words. But knowing Miya, I played along. I turned to her, smiled, and nodded. “I enjoyed it a lot.”

“I'm glad...” she said softly.

Miya walked to the railing and placed her crossed arms on it. “How do we end a Valentine’s Day date?”

I walked to the spot next to her and said, “I tell you that I love you?”

Miya laughed softly. “Let’s be more original… I know!” Miya turned her head my way, “Why do you love me?”

The question caught me off-guard, but there had to be a reason. “I’m not really sure. Maybe it’s because I love talking to you and spending my time with you. Maybe it’s because you made me feel like there’s a place where I belong.” Suddenly recalling many things from the last few days, I added, “Maybe it’s just that I love everything about you.”

Miya looked disappointingly at me, “You just went back to the question.”

“Well, it’s hard to answer! How would you answer something like that?” I complained.

Miya pointed at herself. “Are you asking me why I love you?”

Suddenly, I felt as if I was being vain. After all, Miya just accepted my love for her without really saying if she loved me or not. “Well… do you?” I asked.

“Yes!” she answered without hesitation.

Her answer cheered me up. But I wasn’t going to let myself be distracted from the topic at hand. “Well, why do you love me then?”

Miya closed her eyes and faced the city view. “It’s simple. I love you because I love the me that’s with you.” She turned back to me and smiled.

Her answer was surprisingly simple. But, at the same time, it made perfect sense. Her answer left me speechless, pondering on the thought.

“Well, let’s go eat dinner. My treat!” she called me as she walked to the door.

“Okay, but I’m treating!” I replied, following her.

On the way out, both of us kept insisting on treating the other. But both of us ended up just agreeing on going dutch, as usual. We returned to the seafood restaurant since Miya enjoyed the fish. I wanted to walk Miya home, but she didn’t want to and persisted in walking me home instead. On the way home, I asked her how long it took her to think about her answer to the question earlier. She just smiled and told me she knew it from the start.

My mom was home when we arrived. She was surprised to find out that I had a girlfriend. She wanted Miya to stay in the house a bit longer, but Miya refused, saying her parents would be worried about her. After that, she left, leaving me with a Valentine’s Day I would never forget.

Day15

A new day arrived. Everything was finally back to normal, though not the same as when Miya and I were a couple. When Miya and I greeted each other this morning, I saw a puzzled Hitori looking at the two of us.

Hitori acted like a kid playing spy games for the whole day, peeking at the two of us when we talked, while hiding behind a book. Of course, I played along with him, pretending that I didn’t notice him doing what he’s been doing.

He seemed contented by what he saw after classes and didn’t tell me anything about his findings. Hopefully, he concluded that he imagined the distance between us yesterday.

I saw Miya at her usual place again. I silently closed the door behind me and went to the spot beside her as stealthily as I could. It didn’t seem to me like she noticed my entrance. “The sky seems so close, isn’t it?” I asked.

Miya seemed startled and quickly turned to me. “But even if we extend our hands as far as we could,” I continued as I extended my hand in front of me. “We can’t even come close to touching it.” I finished dramatically.

“What the heck did you eat?” Miya exclaimed while laughing.

“What? I thought it was cool!” I replied.

Miya crossed her arms and placed her right hand on her chin. “Hmm… Maybe if you had a background song. Something slow at first but will change later on.” She hummed an unfamiliar tune. “Kinda like that.”

I stared at her for a while. Turning my head to the view in front of me, I answered, “Maybe I’ll work on it.”

I heard her stifle a laugh before asking, “So, what’s up?”

I wanted to ask her how she feels about the two of us being together again, but I couldn’t find the courage to say it. “Do you want me to help pair you up with Hitori?” I asked instead, turning to her. I felt so stupid asking that, but there was no way to take back my words.

She looked at me with a concerned face before turning her head away and looking down. “That’s not necessary,” she answered. Lifting her left hand to tuck her hair behind her ears, she continued, “I’m already over him.” The wind blew her hair and her hair danced to the wind.

Hearing those words boosted my confidence a little. If I were to ask, I thought it was the best time. “So, does that mean we-”

“I can’t get back together with you,” her words cut me short. She turned to look at my eyes and looked away. “We should just stay friends.”

Her words hurt a lot. But those words only meant she didn’t love me anymore, so I didn’t want to urge her to change her mind. “Ouch, got it.” I tried to laugh, turning to the view in front of me again.

We stayed silent for a long time after that, just watching the sun sink behind the buildings. But I felt that if I didn’t say anything to make us feel better, things will become awkward again. “If there’s someone else you like, I would be happy to help you.” I told her with a shaky smile.

An upset Miya looked turned to me and turned away again. “A person like me isn’t allowed to love and be loved. I mustn’t be selfish anymore.”

Those words of hers depressed me. I realized she was still punishing herself for breaking up with me, and I can’t just let her be like that. “Then why are you being so selfish?” I asked.

“Huh?” she turned to me. “How am I selfish?”

I smiled and placed my hand on her head. “You’re carrying all the pain by yourself. If you really wanted me to be your friend, then you should share your pain with me.”

Miya crossed her arms on the railing and rested her buried her face in her arms. “You know I’m still feeling guilty about breaking up with you, right?”

“Of course,” was my reply.

“Then you should know that it was me who wavered and is at fault,” she said with a shaky voice.

“True,” I sighed. “But there were two hearts that were broken that night. Is only one allowed to cry over it?”

Miya slowly turned to me. Tears streamed down her cute face. At that moment, she looked so fragile and innocent. It was as if she was ready to shatter with just a small impact.

I reached for her head and pulled her a little. She moved along with the smallest strength and I wrapped her in my arms. “I’m not asking for permission to love you as I know I will continue to do so even if you refuse. What I’m asking is whether or not you would return the favor.”

She lifted her arms to wrap my body before whispering, “I guess I can’t escape selfishness. Then allow me to be as selfish as I want.”

I continued holding her. She was so soft that I wanted to hug her as tightly as I could, but, at the same time, so fragile that I felt like I have to hold back. When I felt a little content, I tried asking what I’ve wanted to ask for a while. “Does that mean we’re together again?”

Miya pulled her arms then pushed herself away from me. ”Huh?” she asked.

Her reaction made me nervous. Scratching my head, I asked, “I mean… Are we… I mean are you…” I couldn’t manage to finish my sentences as I looked at Miya’s angry expression.

“You think I’m your girlfriend again?” she asked.

She was smaller than me. But I felt so sheepish and small in her glare. Sighing deeply, I finally answered, “Yes! That’s what I wanted to ask.”

Her angry expression didn’t hold out and she giggled. Smiling at me, she asked, “Would you take me?”

I felt so happy and relieved that I pulled her and hugged her tightly, forgetting to hold back. I listened to her laughter as she hugged me back.

In just that afternoon… no

In just the past few days

I’ve witnessed different sides of Miya. A strong girl, who carried all her pain behind a smile; an honest girl, who revealed to me everything she went through with just a look; a distant girl, who seemed so far away with her thoughts; a cheerful girl, who I always looked forward to seeing; a confused girl, who seemed so lost; a cold girl, who seemed so different from the Miya I knew; a loving girl, who looked at me so longingly; a selfless girl, who shouldered all the pain; a depressed girl, who felt she had no right to be happy; a fragile girl, who seemed ready to shatter at any moment; a scary girl, within whose eyes I felt so weak and helpless in; and the girl I just embraced in my arms, whom I don’t want to ever let go of. Every side of her was different from the rest, yet all were fragments which complete the girl I fell in love with.

Day14

On the way home yesterday, I wore the necklace. I glanced at almost every girl I see. I saw some of them glance back at me, though they were nothing but strangers’ glances. It was a stupid thought after all… The thought of it really being a magic necklace.

I also brought along the necklace today, thinking it might help boost my confidence or something, though I kept it in my bag the whole day. Miya acted really distant from me during class hours. The way she acted was as if she hated me and was pretending I didn’t exist. Hitori also noticed it, which is strange as Hitori’s not really the observant type.

Everyone ate lunch outside today. The air was nice and Shinji, our class president, asked everyone if they wanted to eat outside together this lunch. Everyone accepted, of course. I didn’t enjoy having lunch outside, unfortunately, so I ate as quickly as I could. Hitori also finished lunch early and he followed me to the classroom. I knew something was up. So after taking my seat, I asked him what was bugging him.

Hitori slammed his hands on my table. “Something’s wrong…” he said as he glanced around the room. He tends to make useless things dramatic. His idiocy makes him fun to be with.

Deciding to play along, I leaned close to him and whispered, “So you noticed it too… I’ve been feeling it the whole day.”

“What are you talking about?” he exclaimed. His loud voice completely ruined the atmosphere he created.

“I was just messing with you,” I sighed. “So, what did you notice?”

“Miya’s acting colder than usual toward you,” he answered. “After winter break, you two acted differently. But you soon acted a little friendly with each other again. Right now, you seem invisible to her.”

I was shocked by everything he said. He was surprisingly able to notice so much for a person who seemed self-centered. “You’re imagining things,” was all I could say.

“No, there’s really something going on with you two. Tell me what it is. Wait, don’t tell me…” he paused, to make a dramatic effect. Slamming my table again, he exclaimed, “Miya’s been seeing somebody else?”

I admit, he was quite sharp, for an idiot. But I didn’t feel it was right that I pair him up with Miya. After all, I might just ruin her chances by trying. Leaving her romance up to her is the best choice. “You’re letting your little mind go too wild. That’s dangerous, you know?” I sighed again.

Crossing his arms, he gave up. “Fine, I still think something’s up though,” he said as he walked back to his seat.

Our classmates returned to the room a few minutes after the conversation, which was lucky. The commotion he made might cause rumors to spread.

Honestly, after yesterday, I thought Miya wouldn’t come to the roof for a few days. But when I arrived, there she was, resting her arms on the handrails, as usual.

“Hello there, young lady,” I greeted. “What are you doing up here alone?” I asked, trying to mask my voice.

I thought it might amuse her, but it seemed like it just irritated her. Burying her face in her arms, I heard her mutter, “Quit it, Kyosei.”

I stood beside her, also resting my arms on the railing, and looked at her. Hearing those words made me feel as if I was with a totally different person at the time. “What’s wrong?” I asked, concerned now.

“Sorry… I’m just bothered by some stuff,” she whispered.

“Care to talk about it?” I asked. I was relieved she didn’t seem as cold anymore.

She shook her head, “No thanks…”

“C’mon, it’ll make you feel better.” I urged, feeling like I have to make her talk.

She just sighed deeply and shook her head once more, still buried in her crossed arms. I stopped trying. I knew pushing her will just make her mood worse. I rested my head on my crossed arms on the hand rail, looking at her direction. She looked like she was crying, though I knew that wasn’t the case as she wasn’t sobbing and her breathing seemed normal.

After some time, she turned her head a little to look at me, who was looking at her. “Miya-chan wants to talk now?” I asked in a babying voice.

She returned her head back to the previous position and stifled a laugh. Raising her head, she turned to me with a smile, “I’m afraid if I tell you, I’m going to have to kill you.”

“Fair enough, proceed,” I said with another voice, imitating a secret agent.

Resting her head on her arms, looking at me, she whispered with a small smile, “I hate myself.”

“Because you’d have to kill me?” I joked.

Letting out a small laugh, she answered, “Because I don’t know myself anymore.” She pushed herself away from the railing and sat down, resting against it now. She looked at me and patted the ground beside her, motioning to have me sit down.

Of course, I took her offer. I sat down beside her before she continued, “I feel as if I’m not the person controlling this body anymore. It’s as if I’m just watching myself from a distance.”

I fingered my chin, pretending to think deeply. “Hmm, I do feel distant with you this whole day.” I looked at her, “Maybe I was watching you alongside you…”

“I really love talking to you,” she giggled. “You always seem to manage cheering me up.”

“Don’t stop yourself from doing so then. I love your voice, you know,” I whispered.

“Well, sometimes a person should be left upset,” she whispered. “In joy, it is easy to lose sight of what’s important. In sadness, you learn to appreciate what you’ve lost.”

“Words of wisdom from my cute little pessimist.” I patted her head, “If you were happy all the time, should anything else matter?”

She closed her eyes and hugged her knees, “Sadly, yes…”

The sun went lower and everything was enveloped by darkness. The almost vanishing sunlight gave enough light to surround us, protecting us from the vast darkness. I watched our shadows on the ground stretch toward the wall beside the door. I turned to Miya, “It’s getting late isn’t it?” I pushed the ground and tried standing up, but I was pulled down by a tug on my sleeve.

“I’d like to stay here with you for a few minutes. Would you honor me this humble request?” she asked in a voice, softer than I’ve ever heard her before.

Of course, I agreed. “Oh yeah, you still have to kill me…” I replied.

She laughed softly and rested her head on my arm. “Granting my request has spared you your life.”

The sun was already long gone when we both decided to go home.